I live by checklists. In my twenties, it brought a sense of satisfaction to check things off my list. Now it’s become a survival technique…to remember what I need to do. In my late forties, I can barely recall what I ate for breakfast.
This morning I’m making a list of life skills my teenager needs to transition into successful adulthood. Here’s what I’ve come up with so far:
- Decision-making and problem-solving.
- Managing stress and emotions.
- Ability to read
- Advocate for themselves at school and later the workplace.
- Communication skills
- Relationship and social skills
- Self-care (nutrition, exercise, sleep, and mental health)
- Independent care (shopping, cooking, cleaning, finances)
- Finding a balance (work/school, relationships, lifestyle)
- Conscientiousness “the quality of wishing to do one’s work or duty well and thoroughly”
I realize there’s quite a bit left to teach before he leaves the nest. My son is 17, holy cow – it snuck up on me!
Thing is, just like reading, many kids with neurological differences need explicit instruction. Covid has presented a unique opportunity for us to work with our children. Relying on experts would be a good thing – if you can afford it. It’s all out-of-pocket since insurance doesn’t cover working with a skills trainer unless you have a diagnosis like autism. They run over $100/hour for each session, and with this laundry list of skills will cost thousands!
So I’m trying to introduce skills by talking but finding it hard to communicate with a teenage boy who doesn’t see the need for it. I remember when I was that age, no one taught me. I learned these skills when I went off to college and as a young adult. I would hope the same for him, but since he’s my firstborn and needed support all along, I’m not taking chances. Gonna enlist some help and resources and continue teaching (while trying not to annoy) till he launches. Looks like I’ll be adding another title, “skills trainer” to my parenting resume.