I wondered if any of you felt the way I did years ago, in total overwhelm, just trying to get thru the day, unable to see the trees beyond the forest. I didn’t believe I could change our family dynamic. 
We’d already seen a few psychologists, had weekly behaviorist support in our home for years, lots of testing, lots of experts. I read so many parenting books. I’d search on Amazon, find the most popular parenting books, then borrow from the library. This went on for years, consulting the “books” and the “experts.” I too have experienced explosive child behavior, so many days I prayed for bedtime. I was scared of who my children would grow in to, and how they’d behave as teenagers. I recall seeing a picture, of a three-year-old girl on the windshield of her parents car with a baseball bat bashing it in. The caption read, “imagine your child as a teenager” That really scared me because I saw that as my child, on the road to destruction. I had two explosive children, one filled with rage, needing to be restrained and the other threatening to end it all.
I’m am living proof that you can create a calm, and happy home. It took a lot of work to learn to parent these kiddos. My husband and I worked with doctors that served as parent coaches. We put structure in the home, academic supports, and changed the way we parented (as a team) and connected with one another. The results have been nothing short of a miracle.
Thru the pandemic and schooling at home, I shudder to think what life would be like had we not made these changes. My children are thriving, self-directed students, all schooling from home. There is peace in the family, and peace in my heart.
I didn’t believe it was possible, but it is. For everyone.